Naïve compulsions and micro organisms at three – knock me dead!

What a crazy week. Just shoot me now. Please! Take me out back and put me out of my misery. Yes, yes, a .45 will be fine. Thank you.

I’m being sought after wanting to get a piece of my flesh and in due course might just plonk me floating dead along Pasig river - wrapped in plastic.

Avoiding contacts from people ( which I find quite stupid), who wants to get ripped anyway? As much as possible, I’d not want to identify anyone for this. Knock me off, I am above suspicion! It takes a lot of sacrifice to do this – avoiding someone , sigh.

Good lord

Bang my head against the wall for a while.

Current music: silence. Yes. I so deserve it. Nine and a half hours yesterday, nine and a half today. 19 hours this weekend. Shoot me. Please.

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You who wants to kaploon me - I really don't think ill of you.

You're a complex kid, but you need to know that representing yourself to
yourself is fraught with paradox. Saying what you don't mean means something;
saying what you mean means something. I won't pretend to have the ability to
sort that out for you.

Perhaps you world is too small for you, too parochial (no pun intended).
When you go to a larger, other place you'll see you have loyal compatriots.

The problem lies in the intellectualization (a word??) of things: knowing
what you mean and don't mean and saying that you know what you mean and don't mean. There is the third part, too, where you subconsciously know what you mean and say otherwise thinking that you actually said what you meant.
Utterly mind-boggling.

I don't get it. But I get what you say: that perception is just that: how one
perceives something; you can't change other people's perceptions if you want
to change how they perceive them. (I think...) That's taking everything at
the sociological level instead of the psychological level if you do. You
said: "you're a complex kid"...the thing is, human beings are by nature
complex, yet not all of them (not even many or a few of them) understand
their own complexity-which I think happens to a select few when they (or
shortly before they) die. By that philosophy, there's one caveat: death and
complete enlightenment go hand in hand. An awful catch, really. But it's
not like I believe in that as far as a practice, merely an idea.

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Despite all the compulsion, I still rewarded myself with a nice Carbon bag – amazing! And some stuff I got from Jo ( Joyce Orena ) at Greenbelt one lazy morning. Hugs myself!

MY ART

( L-R , TOP Practice sketch / vintage top - Ink on Paper , practice sketch 2 - Ink on construction paper, Crayola on Styro BOTTOM Watercolor on Paper, Black and White Photos 1 & 2 )

( L-R , TOP Pagpukaw - Ink , watercolor, charcoal on Paper , practice sketch 2 - Ink on construction paper BOTTOM craypas on board Paper - entree )

I wasn’t expecting this day to be stress free. As usual, everything was properly coordinated except for one thing – darn! One big total damnation just gave my pocket a big hole. Me being impulsive, the evil military thing hanging somewhere along the rack in Tyler just caught me – I was trapped, tied! The hell! I still got it, and oh – amazing.

Lunch – yeah, boring lunch after a quick stroll at power plant. Kare-kare , a pill of dulcolax to give me extreme intestinal explosion , oh I just love the feeling of letting go haha. Hiroshima!

Thanks grandpa for the Balenciaga vintage jacket. Oh, minor alteration and its good to go. Hahaha

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6:15 at Ayala, I had the worst creamy chocolate on earth! I so hate Gloria Jeans! Good thing it didn’t cost much. But still, P80 grand for a stupid cup of mud, argh crap man!

7:00 - Light dinner at Spam Jam with Alex, a good laugh, grocery and slight contemplation at Kenzo. I need a work bag for myself, a new one!

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Baby, I aint a brat. Maybe I’m just fortunate enough to get the things I want without forcing them to buy it for me. Thanks for the knitted tie, I so love it. Just waiting for the right white dress shirt to pair it with. I’ll be getting them next week.

What made me smile for the past two weeks despite my crappy schedule and raindrops.

• 5 tailor made, French cuffed dress shirts – at long last!
• 4 tailor made trousers in bluish gray, khaki and chocolate.
• A balenciaga vintage jacket from Popsie.
• More colognes from tita Nel.
• Amazing knitted slim tie from my baby. Mwah
• Tyler military cardigan
• Polo garage summer shorts – clam diggers
• GC from my boss – amazing! Haha
• Inspiration from the people around me, thanks guys
• Happy days with Bee and Cheska, you guys are my savior!
• Unplanned overspending trip with my bud Cheska- oh you floon!
• Dads birthday
• Oompah loompahs with my cousin Melissa
• Shopping with Tita Nel
• Pineapple steak at kooka bar and dark brewed coffee at Kohikan
• A text message from my sisters and Mommy
• Dads hirit – dad, I know you can be really baduy with your hirits but its all good.haha
• More ties from Anchorage- thanks Tita Rose.
• Gods LOVE - I love you!

********

NOIR, TENORIO MANILA

ñ spanish restaurant with René Barbier Red and White Wines

present

Tenorio Manila's Noir Collection
Manila's sexiest designer shoes in black, black, and black.
A Shoe sales event, 31 August 2005 Wednesday at ñ Spanish Restaurant at Rockwell

Orders will be taken and purchases received on that night, 31 AUG 2005.
Wednesday, 6pm onwards (open bar for the ladies, 6 to 8pm)

I. All pairs sold and ordered on that night will be discounted by Php 1000.
All orders made that night shall require a 50% down payment.
II.Brian Tenorio and the Tenorio Manila Team will be fitting shoes
and/or taking measurements on that night. We will keep your measurements
as your individual personal shoe/fit profile..
III. All Tenorio Manila clients who purchased pairs from our last launch at the Volvo Showroom will get an additional Php 500 discount
(over and above the Php 1000 discount offered on that night; except
for the flat sandals).
IV. Brian Tenorio will play the intelligently darkest audio
tracks, from Badu to Bocelli, from Madonna to Maxwell,
from Sade to Sting. Noir is about depth and richness;
noir is blacker than black, and hotter at that.
V. The sexiest Male and Female will be awarded a pair of
Tenorio Manila X-Sandals and Php 1000 gift check (for the men)
and a Noir Evening Sandal (for the ladies). The details for these
awards are discussed below.*

www.tenorium.com/noir

* hey Bryan, sorry. I'll catch up next time - I owe you one, promise! :p congratulations man , see yah soon

Fucked up with work, as usual – I didn’t get I wanted. Have been up for the past 10 hours and all I want is a good sleep, an amazing crotch scratch and a tummy rub. I got myself 6 tabs of neozep to cure my stuffy and some extra tabs to get me dehydrated, I mean…extract my almost full tummy!

Oh starbucks and my glorious gift check, thank god for Passion tea – spray me, ohhh orgasmic!

Five minutes at Marion Godart, contemplating, still thinking – I actually spotted a carry on khaki work bag , where are the straps? Nahh I don’t really need it!

At carbon, ten minutes after, I spotted an amazing black leather backpack with grey canvass trimming, god! Time to give dad a ring haha

Dinner at Gaudi, a ride home – amazing! Hey, thanks for the sleek knitted slim tie you gave me man, you shouldn’t have!

Hey Dad, Happy birthday aight?