June 15, 2006

detoxified Ashley

May 22, 2006

I had an Ashley Olsen moment, one morning, cooling myself with a glass of iced blended mango cream and a slice of chewy orgasmic chocolate brownie at CBTL Salcedo with my friend Chesca. I’ve always these moment when I feel like not dressing up for work, my usual Monday dilemma, shower – shave – pull whatever’s available – splash then zoom. Immaculate white plaid tartans with a hint of azure, indigo jeans and a pair of trainers paired with my ever handy leather bag with all my daily provisions. I feel totally drab like one healthy raccoon with some excess baggage around my plasmas – I mean, check out my eye bags. Sometimes I feel like poking my entire body with tubes to deflate myself, detoxify myself with weight lost claiming Chinese herbal tea and pills that would perk me up like bi-polar Bonzo’s. Chesca on the other hand looked stunning


Sauna belts don’t work, firming gels are crazy – ginger sliming lotions gave me blisters, I still am addicted to starving myself, just a mouthful of Japanese cakes on Sundays and a piece of banana to help me distress while enjoying solitude somewhere inside my four walled kingdom – my bathroom.

journal entry

12:01 AM – June 14, 2006 / journal entry
Inside my room

Eight hours sitting in front of the computer, body – idle, an empty cubicle beside me, hand sanitizer dripping from its broken container. These are the everyday occurrences that fascinated me to just contemplate on how things are going everyday. I mean, I have been wasting a lot of useless minutes aside from work doing stuff I should not really be doing like origami, unnecessary paper cut outs just to pass inoperative time, it is plain worthless when I could have done something more important than just amusing myself.

The past week of inactivity - yeah, I even had no time to update my journal due to stress and incorrect financial management – I decided to walk a few kilometers from my office to Salcedo Village for three straight days and maybe take the cab or have someone pick me up from there on my way home. It was the right moment to for me to spend some quality quiet time with the Lord while enjoying the cool breeze at Velasquez Park. Early morning dew drop – I came across an amazing realization while walking.

I am filled with hope, it is insane! I could not believe I am damn content with my life despite life hurdle. He overflowed me with the fruit of the spirit. Godliness in contentment is a great gain ( 1 Timothy 6:6-8). Be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee ( Hebrews 13:5). It is just to amazing how I have come alive after all these years.

“Do not ask yourself what the world need; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world need are people who have come alive.”

The missed opportunities I encountered made me stronger and intensified my relationship with God. “Everything we are given and everything we are deprived of is nothing but a finger pointing out of the directions of God’s hidden promise which we shall face in full.” It thrills Him most when we acknowledge Him as our perfect gift and contain His love, for these are the gifts that endure. Keep traveling steadily along [the Lord’s] pathway and in due season he will honor you with his blessing ( Psalm 37:34). Everything in life is a blessing – live life in victory.