Showing posts with label bored. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bored. Show all posts

October 21, 2008

WEEKEND ATTENTION DISORDER ( ON BEING IDLE)

This photo just made my day ( photo: Altamira NYC)

I asked myself regarding my two weekends of pure boredom which I suspected might have some sketchy points. During those two weeks, I was trying so hard to stay connected in the moment, so that as much of the experience as possible would imprint on my mind for recall in the years ahead. My connection to details around me notably decreased, as I focused more and more inwardly, noting less and less of the activity and atmosphere around me.

In my mind I'm working on various postpartum ( I was never pregnant and will never be haha) posts, though none of them have hit the keyboard. My days alone for the past few weekends seem to unwind in light speed, eaten up by every-two-hours bathroom break sessions with my stock of style magazines ( yes I have a dresser full of GQ, Details, Cargo, Esquire, Nylon, Wallpaper, I.D etc), unending lack of activity due to multiple wardrobe changes throughout the day, and a compulsion to have my room as clean as possible at all times. At first, this compulsion was motivated by the constant and sometimes unexpected stream of inactivity in the past two weeks. But, now that I’m back on track, I still feel compelled to spend every moment endlessly tidying. This is not how I want to spend this priceless time alone which expires today.

This gives me a strange pleasure, and makes me feel more responsible somehow. I wake up each Saturday with a long list of cleaning and organizing projects, and develop an unkind headache if I try to ignore the next item on the list. I feel certain this attention to my microcosm is also propelled by the fact that I have been bored an unusually over productive. I have started to become a bit claustrophobic, and I'm pretty sure the constant housecleaning is some reaction to that. The longer I'm pinned in these walls, the more dust and general muck I see, and panic that the existence of such things will get me reported to the yaya patrols.

Schedule for the week of October 20 – 26

· I’ll be covering fashion week thanks to Lester
· My friends funeral on Thursday – I’ll miss you man!
· More new business for the agency
· Bag search – I’m in need of a new tote
· Recycle!
· Visit to Viktors – thank god they’re now in greenbelt 5!

September 02, 2008

Weekend advil attack

Let me wrap this weekend up right. I need to get my mind off everything and just have some fun. The past two weeks has been so busy that I hardly have known my own name. Yesterday was a much better day, hopefully today continues to be better. I think I’ll be most thrilled when my sleeping pattern goes back to normal, some sanity for myself wouldn’t hurt either. I’m sticking my head in the sand as to avoid any extra drama in my life. I am an open book, I don't get embarrassed and for sure not shy at all. All this buzz is giving me a headache. I need my bottle of advil back!

( Bored and blogging, a cup of coffee and the view of EDSA from my peep hole)

August 21, 2008

ON RETAIL AND VINTAGE BIKES

If only mom allowed me to leave for the US for my easter 3 week design and pattern making scholarship at PSD,NY Last year, everything’s sweeter now.

Anywaay – I’m still keeping the FAITH!

( What I'm wearing : Shirt from Hanes, Jacket from E-bay, Jeans from Viktors, lace-ups from Tyler)

I daydream about working as boutique owner at a place like Barcelona or probably Soho. It's the kind of job I think I could be really good at, though I'm sure the pay is crap, but I still daydream, it sure is a goal-attainable dream. (At least, not with my overpriced tiny pad.)

I don’t want to drive a car, I don’t like cars (weird huh) I am contended being a passenger, yeah – just a passenger. I have simple dreams. I just want to own a Bike, a vintage bike. I dream of going to work in shorts, espadrilles and a well tailored dress shirt.

I'm starting to think that sadness is like a bad infection that can take root and turn lots of things to rot around you. It seems to be hanging on some people’s life right now, like a spot on the floor that can't be scrubbed out. I am definitely not the type.

August 12, 2008

WASTED CRAYON

I've been doodling with paint since grade school. It started out as a mandatory thing that I loathed my instructor for making me paint something I really didn’t like. The stuff I painted was truly horrible. Emotional and totally strange, but I did it - and realized I loved it.The more I painted , the better I got (I think) so I enjoyed it even more. Over time, it became a stress reliever (aside from retail therapy). When things were pretty down in the dumps, I write. It's not hard for me. It doesn't take much time at all. I'm not a big De Quiros thinker-type, I just write what comes spewing out my enlarged head. I'm in a drought now. I have had them before - when things are just beyond terribly unpleasant and the " I do not feel like doing anything" kind of phase. Or, when things are just so great and I'm here, lazy, and totally don't feel compelled to write. Thankfully, right now I'm stuck in the latter stage and haven't written anything like who knows when because I'm too dimly content to work.
(My set I did last year)
I tried to work on something fun last week, just to force myself into it, but it went something like this:blank canvas, totally blank.

I mean, the thoughts were there, but I couldn't get them to form anything interesting or creative. Instead, I just forced myself up and tossed my sketchbook back on my bedside table. I've never believed in forcing yourself to write or paint. Creative outlets and some good combustion, and when I just "write to write" it comes out like uhg, and then I feel bad and think I have no talent.What good is that?

Shopping cures depression

(repost: June 29,2007)

July 23, 2008

SEEING DOUBLE

Photobucket
Picture above totally reminds me of myself minus the newsboy hat , glasses and my extra baggage around my waist.

1. blue gingham dress shirt
2. blue jeans
3. tan bag
4. tie from Vietnam ( gift from R. Ricafort)
5. multicolored socks

picture taken from Altamiro NYC :
http://altamiranyc.blogspot.com

July 16, 2008

WHAT'S IN MY BAG

Bag: Fred Perry Canvas everyday bag. This simple canvas bag is large enough to hold my notebooks, magazines, camera and even an extra shirt when necessary.

1. Kiehl’s lip balm #1: has SPF 4, tastes icky but it works
2. Burt’s bees beeswax lip balm : tastes yummy and it works too
3. Moleskin plain notebook: large enough for note taking at meetings and for polaroids. This is where I keep my lists of everything and notes of last Sunday’s service. Also great for quick sketches when bored.
4. Planner from my best friend Cheska: A pleasure to use every day

5. 1976 Rayban aviators from Dad: I like simple, well-made things, both of these have held up through endless travels
6. Fino orange leather card case: It is not huge, but is big enough to hold business cards, and all other necessities.
7. After coffee mints: you don’t really want to smell bad!
8. Orange and Green fluorescent markers: glow when you cant find them
9. Office ID
10. Silver Canon digital IXUS I zoom : I click when I see something nice ( and I mean it!) haha
11. My old Nokia N70

June 17, 2008

360 degree turn to contentment (Still Pushing)

I never thought I could be so happy with a bunch of incomplete stuff around me. Life is good ...

I can make these confessions of sloth and ineptitude because I feel no shame whatsoever! My previously pristine pad is now what I would describe as 'Almost Tidy' and, for the first time in ages (pun!)
I'm not overly concerned with my extra weight, the size of my thighs or the wrinkles (or are they laugh lines?) around my eyes.
I'm not overly concerned because (drum roll) I've got more important things to worry about! The things that used to seem vitally important to me are just not so important anymore. Maybe, this change in priorities seems like an obvious development to everyone else out there but, well, it's been a real 'Helen-Keller-hand-under-the-water-faucet' kind of awakening for me.

It's been an awesome and ferocious month and I suspect the next few months will be equally as dizzying and as bittersweet

I find myself really missing the South these days - and wishing I had my family around to share all this with.